Working Out and Weight Issues.

Every since college started, I've been gaining weight from eating too much or not eating enough. A few months back, I weighed myself and realized that I had gained 20 pounds from just a few months. That was pretty shocking. I know, stereotypically, girls are constantly watching their weight, always needing to be reassured that their body size is perfect ("Do I look fat in this?" or "I'm voluptuous, not fat.") and up to college, I was okay with my weight. I used to be really skinny as a kid since all I did was act like a monkey around the playground, but after middle school kicked in and puberty hit, I began to eat more and become less active (I discovered the joys, or in retrospect, pains, of the internet) and started to gain weight constantly.

After the first two years of high school, PE was no longer required (though, I did a semester of swimming) and I just never really broke out of the habits of eating a lot and fell out of habit of just playing around outside.

In any case, even then, I was okay with my weight. Maybe I had a little chub, but I know that people weren't going "Omg, she's so fat." behind my back. Then college came. After the first two weeks, I was so surprised at gaining around 5 pounds. At first, I didn't really think of it. "Oh, it's only 5 lbs. What's the big deal?" but those five pounds ballooned to 10 lbs, which ballooned to 20 pounds.. I was gaining weight exponentially.

I didn't really work out for the first two quarters. Maybe once in a week or twice a week and then stop for a while. I don't know why it was so erratic, but that was just how it was. Also in the second quarter, I spent most of my time in the basement of Kemper programming 10 hours at a time and would often skip meals. I am so not proud of that. Basically when I got back from finishing up, I was staving to the point that I would eat way too much way too fast and pass out from food comas.

I never realized how important it was to eat regularly. I had always been eating at home and you know, food was provided for you so I didn't have to worry about getting up or going out and getting stuff to eat. But at college, it was so easy to have time pass and forget about eating. I'm not stupid, I know that starving myself will inevitably make me gain weight, but it was hard getting even two meals a day in.

So, right now, I'm making a pact with myself. I'm gonna try and hit the gym every day (at least for most of the week. Maybe skip a day if I'm really sore or have plans) and eat at least two meals with a snack. I've already lost the love of pizza and burgers so I eat those sparingly now.

Anyways, does anyone know what kind of running shoes are good (and painless on a college girl's budget)? My shoes are totally worn out. The heel is pretty slippery...

Biking (accidents) in Davis.

I had handwritten up a blog entry today and I'll type it up now. If I can get Michelle's scanner going, I'll scan in the real copy (if you can even read my handwriting). Excuse any grammar mistakes. Any edits/additional comments will be in [].

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Sometimes, I feel like an airhead. In class right now, 20 minutes earlier than I need to be. So, I guess I'll write an entry for my blog to post later.

Let's see, something funny, well not really funny, happened to be while getting to class just a few minutes before. I was riding my bike, pretty slowly since it was a nice day, and I was about to cut into Wellman (a building) and there was cross traffic since it was a two-way. Now, I had already started to turn and there wasn't really a turning back point so I slowed down to a near stop and some girl rammed into my front tire making me bounce off my seat and landing on my toes.

The girl however wasn't so agile and flipped over her bike... well, more like slid off my bike and fell. At that moment, I was feeling really guilty and was kind of panicky. [You know, when you know you did something bad and didn't really want to face the consequences?] I asked her if she was okay or not and [she] didn't answer me till someone else came and asked her. She was like "I'm okay. Jesus Christ. [Are you serious? Are you serious?] You can't do that, you just can't do that."

After heard that, the tone that she said it in, all the guilt went away and I almost laughed in her face. I mean, "Calm your ass down. It was an accident." I didn't get mad when some guy crashed into me and I sprained my wrist. [Right before a midterm no less.] All you go was probably a scrape, though I didn't see. Anyways, it would have been extremely insensitive to laugh in her face so I had to hold it in. But seriously? You don't have to be a bitch about it. I know I was wrong and unlike some people, when I say I'm sorry, I really do feel sorry. Like, I have the actually [LOL, weird adverb injection] guilt and regret that it means to be sorry. But if you're just gonna blow off an apology and then try and tell me what to do? [In hindsight, it sounded more like a mom reprimanding their kid. Wtf, I'm not a child.] That's just not cool.

There's only 4 more minutes to class and there are only three people in this classroom, including me. Oh god, I hope I'm not in the wrong room or something because that would be a stupid thing indeed...

Well, I guess I'll just continue writing because just sitting here looking like you don't know what the fuck is going on isn't that great.

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At that point, I decided to grab my stuff, call Michelle and ask her for the room number. Turns out I was in room 106 instead of 126, which was only on the other side of the wall. Yeah, big blonde moment. What do you know, even Asians have those moments. Anyways, what a first day. I'm sleepy. :3

I love shopping.

Usually, I try and dispel stereotypes with girls and show that I'm not a typical girl, but I have a confession: I really love shopping. It's such a bad habit that I picked up during puberty. When I was young, I didn't care what I wore; most of my clothes were stitched together by relatives who knew how to sew scrapes of fabric together to make jeans. I wore things bought in thrift stores, things from other families whose child didn't fit the clothes anymore and just some random shit around the house. And when I was done with them, I would give them to the next person in line. It was a big chain of hand me downs. That's how Asians roll.

So when I got to the age when people actually give a shit about what clothes you wear, I was really confused. I would see these girls wearing things from American Eagle, Abercrombie and Fitch, and Hollister and I would wonder how I would look in those clothes. And then I realized that I couldn't afford the clothes; so I basically survived on department stores and places like Ross or Marshalls. But now that I think about it, I'm glad I didn't buy into the name brand clothes. They're nice clothes and all, but I don't want to be wearing advertisements along my chest.

Anyways, my shopping evolved when I got a shiny credit card. It's like +10 convenience -credit limit. I've been really tempted to go shopping online. All the shit that I couldn't get online, I now have the means to get. How dangerous. Even those stupid infomercials like the magic bullet and bowflex, I want to get all the stuff, even if I don't need it.

Being a girl is hard. So many things to buy, so little money to buy with. :< Any rich guys willing to fund Teresa's Shopping Fund? Hahaha, jk sorta.

Despite wanting to buy a lot of things, I'm usually pretty good at restraining myself from buying too much since I kind of need to eat as well. Ah college.